The Scar
by Fashiondiva
Summary: Ron the Ferret Slayer? Fun in the Hospital Wing! How DOES Dumbledore always know? Hermione weeps! Plus, what is wrong with Harry's scar? It's all inside!
1. Your Scar!

I dont own Harry Potter or any of the works of JK Rowling, I just walk around the studio, waiting for them to follow me home. (Mom, they followed me home can I keep them???) Itll happen eventually right? Right??? 

Holy cheese sculpture of Neptune, Batman-uh, Harry! Ron cried out, red hair flapping in the wind.  
What is it Robin, umm I mean Ron? Harry asked in reply.  
Your scar! Ron yelled, pointing at Harry's forehead.  
Whos scar? What bloody loser has a scar on their forehead? Harry turned around, looking for someone with the telltale scar.  
Oi mate, your scar! With a sudden English accent.  
Harry turned back to Ron, his green eyes filling with tears. God, Ron! Why do you always bring up my dead parents? I hate you!!! At this Harry began to cry uncontrollably.  
Just as Harry was about to turn and run away, who else should approach but...Hermione!  
Noticing Harry was crying she put a hand on his shoulder. Harry, what's wrong? He looked up at her and she gasped. Harry-oh my god your scar!  
Whos scar? What bloody loser has a scar on their forehead? Harry turned around, looking for someone with the telltale scar.  
Your scar, Harry. Hermione looked at Harry with worry.   
Turning back around, Harry called out in anguish. He paused, not knowing the British version of . Quietly he began talking to himself. Lets see, o becomes u, u becomes a, so a becomes e. He took a deep breath and howled.   
Both Hermione and Ron looked at him, their eyebrows raised. They asked.  
Jesus! I know theyre dead! I hate you! I hate all of you! Harry shrieked, covering his face and running awkwardly in diagonal lines down the corridor.


	2. Draco's Secret

Disclaimer- I've said it before, I'll say it again. I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters who belong to JKR. Stop asking for my autograph! It's CHAPTER 2 TIME! YAY!  
  
  
I'm going to do research! Hermione announced, and fled down the hallway the opposite way as Harry had, towards the Library.  
Uh, Herm, Ron asked to the quickly retreating figure who was outside his hearing range. Shouldn't someone tell Harry about his scar??? But just as Ron turned to go to his dormitory, Hermione materialized right in front of him!  
Hermi-what the hell-how did you- He continued to sputter and look utterly confused until Hermioned began to answer him.  
You see, it's quite simple. I just turned the speed transponder on my multiple quantum ionic displacer transtemperal distorter dimentional modulator.  
Ron started to mumble incoherently and began mumbling again. Hermione just shot him a look of great annoyance, sighed and explained. It's a swiss army knife. Ron shook his head in amazement. Plus, it sends you through time.  
The redhead formed a silent with his lips.  
Anyway, Ron, maybe we should go see if- Her voice was interrupted by a horrified scream.  
The crowds split as...Draco Malfoy made his way through, holding a ratty letter in his hand, shaking his head, sending his usually perfect hair in front of his face.   
An abnormally large pug dog scampered up to him and began SPEAKING! it whined in a voice that could only belong to Pansy The Pug Parkinson. What's wrong? It turned to lick his face, but he kicked it and it hit the wall.  
Amazingly it picked itself up and padded back to him.   
I can't believe it. Malfoy whispered. I can't believe it, I don't believe it. I'm....I'm.......I'm poor...  
Ron and Hermione burst out laughing and pointing their fingers at Draco. You're poor! Laughter, Draco Malfoy is POOR! Peals of laughter. Haha LOSER! You're poor!!!!!  
Draco made his way over to them, glaring daggers for having announced to everyone who didn't hear his whisper. Hermione stopped laughing immediately, but Ron persisted.  
In case you forgot, Weasel-y He snarled at Ron. You're poor too.  
Ron stopped laughing. You wanna make something of it, Ferret-boy??? Malfoy stared at him blankly and shrugged as Ron lowered his raised fists. Ok, then do you wanna be poor friends together?  
Draco's face broke into a grin. I've never had a poor friend before! What should we do first?  
Ron asked. Well, what can we afford?  
Draco's smile intensified and he and Ron broke into laughter.  
As he and Draco linked arms, Ron suggested. Hey, let's go mooch off rich people!   
Draco giggled and they skipped down the hallway together, arm in arm, singing We're Off To See The Wizard at the top of their lungs, with a huge pug at their heels.


	3. Harry's Secret

¡Disclaimer!***I do not own Harry Potter, or anything at all for that matter. All the characters are JKR's. Yea...ok done now....***  
¡!¡!¡ BACK TO THE LOONY BIN!¡!¡!  
Hermione huffed. "What about me...always leaving me all alone...such great friends..."Suddenly the door she was standing next to was flung open and she was hit in the nose with the door as Harry re-entered the scene.  
Clutching her nose as if it were about to fall off, she turned quizzically to him. "Ooh, oww yea that hurt...so, Harry, what are you -ow- doing here?"  
"Well, I was sitting in my dorm crying my eyes out but then I realized, how am I going to save the school and the world by sitting in my room? I mean I do have a record going, and how am I going to top myself this year by sitting on my butt?"  
"Well, Harry, umm that's -ow- nice..." He pulled out a mirror and was fixing his hair, which gave Hermione another look at his scar. "Jeez Harry! Can't you see your scar in that mirror!!! It's well, it's-"  
"Hermione!" Harry's eyes were filled with tears, threatening to spill over. "Just because you have parents and I don't doesn't mean you have a right to make fun of me because of it."  
Hermione looked around. They were outside. "How did we-" she began, but noticed that Harry was hunched over, crying.  
"He'll never hear me through all that racket he's making." Her eyes were drawn to the sky. In it was a light shining in the shape of a giant thunderbolt! "Harry!" She nudged him with her foot. "Harry, look at that!!!"  
Harry looked up and gasped. "Run Hermione! Before we're caught out in the rain!!!"  
Hermione shook her head, looking at him. "Harry, it isn't a thunderbolt. Well, it IS a thunderbolt, but not an actual thunderbolt..."  
Harry's forehead creased in confusion. But then he ripped off his clothes to reveal..................  
(A/N...wouldn't I be bad if I ended it here....teehee, teehee...)  
To reveal a neon yellow and green spandex catsuit, with a long neon green cape and neon yellow boots that glowed in the dark (cause it's dark outside). "Woah, Harry, what are you doing? What are you wearing???"  
"Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vengeance-for-their-deaths Man is here to save all!" He shouted, looking around at everyone who was looking at him as if he should be somewhere were nice men in white jackets could be his 'friends'. "Where is my sidekick, Ron the Ferret Slayer (soon to be a new hit TV series!)???"  
Hermione got tense and looked at the ground, saying, "Well, umm, he and Draco Malfoy went off somewhere to do something I think..."  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Harry cried, falling on his knees. "Ron! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
"Oh well," He stood up and brushed off the dirt of his spandex shorts. "Hermione, how would you like to be my new sidekick?"  
Hermione's eyes lit up like a Christmas tree caught on fire. "Would I get a cool name too?"  
"Of course." Harry smiled knowingly. "What other point is there to being a supercool hero besides wearing spandex and having a cool name?" They set to work brainstorming name ideas for Hermione. "Hermione the Bushy Haired Avenger....Yes! That's perfect!"  
"What about my costume..." Hermione asked.  
"Excuse me, is it too late to put in my resume for the sidekick position?" Said a dark voice behind them. They turned to face.........  
  
A/N*Ooh-who could it be? I wonder...(evil cackle...muahahahaha-cough cough CHOKE CHOKE!!!) Aah, thank you for Heimlich(not mine either)-ing me...Next chapter up tomorrow? Perhaps, we'll see...* *Fashiondiva*


	4. Secret Identities And A Power Rangers Fi...

¡!¡ Disclaimer: I own Harry Potter, I own everything having to do with Harry Potter. I also own Cool Whip and I own the song Baby One More Time. Yay! My friends in the pretty white suits are taking me on an adventure! Where to, boys? (Did you believe me? I didn't either...HP is JKRs-nuff said)!¡!  
¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡  
@@@LAST TIME@@@  
"Excuse me, is it too late to put in my resume for the sidekick position?" Said a dark voice behind them. They turned to face.........  
¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡  
**CHAPTER 4: SECRET IDENTITIES AND A POWER RANGER FIGHT  
** They turned to face a man in a suit resembling Harry's. It was also spandex, a black unitard with a hot pink speedo over it, matching pink knee-high boots and cape, which was billowing out behind him even as he stood still. Not to mention the pink ski mask he was wearing, to mask his identity.  
Who are you? asked Harry, conpletely unsure of the masked man's identity.   
The man smirked, which was made visible through the little mouth hole in the ski mask. Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.  
Hold up! Whaaaaaaaaaat? Said Hermione the Bushy Haired Avenger-who was now in her costume, which consisted of big baggy pants sagged down and her boxers showing, a Lakers Jersey, a sideways hat and huge Platinum chains around her neck, and her hair in cornrows- holding up her arms as if she was in a stick-up, trying to do the Ghetto-style coolspeak.  
Oops, sorry. Wrong movie. I am- He pulled off his mask and Harry and Hermione did the surfer pose' (where you bend your knees, stick out your arms like you're surfing and shake around) in shock. He finished in a sing-song voice, making trumpet sounds like the Star Wars music.  
Harry repeated in shock. Then his face turned cold (A/N-Who knows why? There is no logic here!!!), and he glared at Super-Snape. You can't have the sidekick position. It's already been filled. He motioned to Hermione the Bushy Cornrow Haired Ghetto Avenger, who pimp-walked over, but then fell over because of the weight of the ice around her neck. She stood up, but did so with extreme Ghetto-ness.  
Then we must duel to the death! Cried Super-Snape, while pulling his pink ski mask back on.  
At that moment, really cheesy Power Rangers music came on, and Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vengeance-for-their-deaths Man prepared to face Super-Snape in an all out cat-fight duel to the death.  
Boy, you know you can't have this? You wanna piece of me? You wanna piece of me! Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vengeance-for-their-deaths Man cried out, gesturing for Super-Snape to come and get him. Super-Snape only snapped his jaws back, trying to take a bite.   
As the music intensified, Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vengeance-for-their-deaths Man and Super-Snape began the duel, throwing bitch-slaps and sharp fingernails at each other. Hair was pulled, costumes were ripped and make-up smeared. In the backround, Hermione the Bushy Cornrow Haired Ghetto Avenger could be seen Crip-walking to the beatbox sounds in the.....oh yea its Power Rangers music.  
As the fight continued neither side seemed victorious. All of a sudden a huge explosion was heard and Harry aka Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vengeance-for-their-deaths Man jumped into the explosion.   
Harry, Noooooooooooooooo! Cried out Hermione, her braids flying in every direction. But Harry aka Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vengeance-for-their-deaths Man leaped back out of the explosion, carrying safely in his arms a baby bunny rabbit.   
The music stops as all three superheros turn around and smile enormously for a photograph to be taken.   
The music resumes, as does the fighting but Harry is knocked to his feet, hit by a broomstick. Harry, I'm so sorry! Cries out Ron, the ex-Ferret Slayer. Running behind him is Draco Malfoy, shouting out not to be left behind.  
As Harry aka Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vengeance-for-their-deaths Man took his last dying breaths, Ron whispered something to him and Harry was all of a sudden healed magically!  
What do you mean the story isn't over? More chapters? Harry sighed and got up, fixing his cape.  
Again he looked to the sky, and noticed that the Thunderbolt was still there.   
Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vengeance-for-their-deaths Man to the rescue! Where there is lives to be saved, I will save them, exploiting it to the best of my reputation!!! Come, Ron-the-Ferret-Slayer! He ignored Ron's whimperings and ran off into the night, Ron following with Snape following a bit behind, unnoticed.  
Hermione shrugged. What, yo. I don't believe they dissed me like that. Uh uh....no they did-ent! Whateva, I do what I want! I'm goin' to the librizzle, fo' shizzle yo... She turned on her heel and briskly pimp walked out, leaving Draco all alone in the night.  
He smirked evilly. Oh, my evil scheme has yet to unfold... He stood and turned around, falling over. Stupid cape... he muttered.  
¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡  
*A/N-Hey? Did you like my chapter? Sorry it took me a little while to update but I have issues and w/e, I just didn't. K, review please or not. Something tells me that me asking you to won't make a difference! Lotsa Love to the Reviewers!!!!* *Fashiondiva*


	5. Little Old Ladies and an Archnemises or ...

**CHAPTER 5: LITTLE OLD LADIES AND AN ARCHNEMISES OR TWO  
**¡DISCLAIMER!-I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER, OR ANY OF HIS LITTLE FRIENDS. I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING RELATING TO DELL, AND I DO NOT OWN THE TELETUBBIES(DON'T KNOW WHY, JUST HAD TO ADD THAT IN)**  
******

  
Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vegeance-for-their-deaths Man! Cried a little old lady on the side of a road. I am in desperate need of your help!  
Harry grinned, Ron scowled. No one ever says, Ron the Ferret Slayer! I am in desperate need of your help... Ron thought.  
A voice called from a ways down the street. Ron the Ferret Slayer! I am in desperate need of your help!   
Geez!' Ron thought, I have to do everything around here! Don't I ever get a break?' He took off down the street.  
Harry asked the little old lady with a smile, What is it that you need my help for? Did someone mug you? Do you need help crossing the street?  
Umm, no. My back was really itching me, and I was wondering if you could scratch it for me...I can't reach that spot.  
Wait, wait, wait a minute. You mean you called me over here to scratch your back when you are in the middle of a big crowd of people who could do it for you?  
The little old lady hit Harry with her purse. Scratch my back, you little punk hoodlum!  
Said Harry, and bent down to scratch her back.  
Ooh, oh, ahh, that's the spot, no, a little to the right, oh, higher...ahh. The little old lady turned around and looked up at Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whos-parents-were-killed-and-now-is-seeking-vegeance-for-their-deaths Man. Thank you, you have helped me so much. Here, go get an iced-cream on me. The little old lady handed Harry a nickel and started walking across the street, not noticing the huge 18-wheeler truck that was coming.  
Harry was too wrapped up in the shiny nickel that he didn't notice when the mac truck hit the old lady and she went flying up into the air. She landed on her feet, though, as all old ladies do, and after yelling at the dirty little punk hoodlum trucker went on her merry way.  
Harry, after finishing his intense study of the nickel, began walking down the street in search of Ron the Ferret Slayer.  
Ronny-Ron-Ron? Ronella? Ronana-bannana? Ronnie-ronnie-bo-bonnie-fa-nana-fana-fo-fonnie-me-mi-mo-monnie-Ronnie? Wherefore art thou-oof! Cried Harry as he was pulled into a dark alley.  
A small man in a dark orange robe began gleefully dancing in front of Harry. Heehee, heehee, teehee-hee...I've got you at last, my pretty...  
Harry began to cry, his face disturbingly contorted. Who sob are you? Sob Why sob did you SOB kidnap me? sob Who are you?  
Teehee-hee...you mean you don't remember me, young Harold? The man asked, his dance of joy increasing, nearing the dance of elation.   
Harry backed up against the wall of the alley. You know my real name? That means that you are...you are...oh crap how do you spell your name?  
The small man chuckled in a gigglish way, holding up his hand in a talk to the hand' signal. Screw me with a rubber chicken if I know. Like I came up with it by myself. As if! Lord Voldemort from Tom Marvolo Riddle? That was so a random scrambling from my computer. Dude, I got a Dell! The dance was now a dance of joviality.  
Harry began crying again, for he is very sensitive. But why? Why did you kill my parents? WHY?!?!  
Voldemort stopped his dance of gaiety. Harry, I have something to tell you...its about you, me and your parents...Harry...I...  
!¡!MEANWHILE!¡!  
Ron the Ferret Slayer looked around quizzically. Harry? Where are you? Haaaaaarry? Harry Shmarry? Harry-harry-bo-barry-fa-nana-fana-fo-farry-me-mi-mo-marry-Harry?


	6. Relations and A Reason

!¡!Disclaimer-YAY-K, I don't own Harry Potter (having fun saying that in a British accent now...I did mention I'm American, right? Woo! Go America! What was I saying anyway? Oh ya...) I don't own Harry Potter (giggle) or any of the other characters in this story. They belong to J.K. Rowlung and WB entertainment or w.e....that'd be funny if they combined to for J.K.B....I need to stop now. K! I own nothing-except for my hat-¡!¡  
  
***LAST TIME ON FANFIC...***  
But why? Why did you kill my parents? WHY?!?!  
Voldemort stopped his dance of gaiety. Harry, I have something to tell you...its about you, me and your parents...Harry...I...  
!¡!MEANWHILE!¡!  
Ron the Ferret Slayer looked around quizzically. Harry? Where are you? Haaaaaarry? Harry Shmarry? Harry-harry-bo-barry-fa-nana-fana-fo-farry-me-mi-mo-marry-Harry?  
***********************************************  
**CHAPTER 6-RELATIONS AND A REASON  
**Harry looked into his parents' killer's eyes. Voldemort? What is it?  
Harry, you don't understand. I never meant to, it's just that, well, there is a reason. But Harry, you must know the truth.   
I'm your...your...your second-cousin-twice-removed's-neighbors'-girlfriend's-teacher's-brother in laws's-son's-best friend. I would have never done anything to your dear parents. I loved them like a brother and sister.  
Harry gasped in shock. That means, you are Tom? Tom, Tom, Tom?  
Voldemort smiled. Yes, yes I am.  
You-I remember hearing stories about you from my parents, before they died when I was a year old. Then why?  
You see, Harry, Voldemort began, but was cut off.  
Hello Harry, began a familiar voice. It was I.   
Harry screamed shrilly in a high-pitched squeak. (Backround music-dun-dun-dun....) It was you?  
Yes, it was I.  
Harry screamed again, even higher and more squeaky than before. You mean, it was YOU?  
The deep, scary voice sighed. Didn't I just say that I did it? Don't you people ever listen? Jeez! IT WAS I!!!!!!  
Harry looked confused. You mean, it was...you?  
The frightening terrible voice looked over to Voldemort. Voldie, you wanna help a brother out here?  
Voldemort shrugged. Hey, don't look at me-Hey, I've been thinking that this entire Voldemort' thing has gotten WAY out of control. How about a new name, something friendlier? Like George?  
Harry shook his head. Nope, we've already got a character with that name.  
  
said the perturbing voice.  
  
The voice and Harry spoke together. What the hell is that? Quincy-that's a stupid-ass name.   
Umm, ok, how about I just switch around the letters of Voldemort...how about...Dolvmerot......Melrovdot......nah...I've got it! My new name is.....TROVEMOLD! YES!  
Harry and the voice agreed, and Trovemold smiled. Trovemold cried out in joy.  
Harry's face became solemn again. But why, Volde-oops, I mean Trovemold? Why did you kill me parents?  
Trovemold began, but the ghastly voice cut him off. the voice ominously said. I already told you that it was I that killed your parents.  
Harry gasped. You killed my parents?  
Yes. It was I.  
It was you? Harry began to choke out tears.  
It was I. The voice began to get annoyed.  
Wait...so it was you?  
The voice shouted. I killed your parents!  
Harry nodded, still crying. So you killed my parents...but why?  
The horrific voice smiled deviously. Are you sure you want to know?  
Harry looked puzzled. Want to know what?  
The voice sighed. Why I killed your parents.  
Harry screamed shrilly. You killed my parents?  
The voice shouted, and although it was just a voice it began to yank out clumps of its hair and threw it in stragegically pre-decided locations. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY I KILLED YOUR PARENTS! YOU WANT THE TRUTH?!?! YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!! He paused for Harry was hysterically crying and had curled himself up into a small ball.   
After lots of ing noises and big arm wave-y things, Trovemold and the spooky voice got Harry to clam up.   
Anyway, I was saying that YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH! YOU WANT IT ANYWAY? I killed your parents because they made fun of me before the first year started... His talking subsided to evil (if not extremely girly) giggles and tinklings of laughter.  
Harry immediately stood up and looked the voice in the face. You're telling me that the reason that you killed my parents is because they made fun of you in First year?!?!  
The voice shook his head slightly. Well, not exactly THEY. You see, I heard this rumor on the train coming to Hogwarts for First year that your dad's brother's friend's cousin's neighbor's girlfriend's sister's boss's son's best friend was talking smack about me, and I couldn't just let that go, could I? Harry nodded, knowingly. Well, I forgot most of the relations, so all I could remember was your dad, and I planned my revenge beginning that day. How sweet it was!!!  
Harry opened his mouth and closed it several times, lacking the words he needed to speak. He looked over to Trovemold for some support.  
He received none. Trovemold looked up from his nails which he had been painting electric pink, and glanced from Harry to the Voice in confusion. I'm sorry, I missed that last part, could you repeat it for me?  
*****That's all for now! Check in next time for Harry's reaction and what's going on with Hermione the Bushy Cornrow Haired Ghetto Avenger back at Hogwarts!*****


	7. Cliches A SuperDuper Mushy Moment

*Disclaimer**I do (not) own Harry Potter or anything related to him, J.K. Rowling does. I do own the name though. But if you decide that you want it, you can have that. (Aren't I so nice for sharing? Why can't J.K. Rowling share like I am willing to?)  
  
***Ok, I'm going to Put Harry's reaction in the next chapter. This one is all about our favorite little witch.*-Fashiondiva-ENJOY!  
CHAPTER 7: *CLICHES* (A SUPER-DUPER MUSHY MOMENT)  
  
  
**Hermione smiled to herself. She was in her favorite place in the world, hidden back among the musty, dust covered books in the library. Laughing quietly to herself as she read the words, she turned page after page, smiling in amusement.  
  
Vat are you reading? Hermione's eyes quickly shot up to meet the eyes of one extremely melancholy looking Victor Krum.   
  
She cried out in joy, earning a death glare from Ms. Pince, the crotchety old librarian. Lowering her voice, she questioned him. Victor? What are you doing here?  
  
I've come to see you, German-ninny.  
  
She corrected.  
  
What's a Hermione, Hack-o-naitinny?  
  
My name! She hissed.  
  
Yes, I know your name, Gritsinkzo-ninny. Victor tilted his head as he gazed at Hermione, looking quite puzzled.  
  
Yes, well... She ran a hand through her cornrows and her smile faded. Victor, what are you doing here? I thought you decided a week and a half ago that we would be better as friends?  
  
Yes, well Hermione, Hermione gasped at his words that were free of his accent. You see, I'm not really Chinese...  
  
Umm, I thought you were Russian?  
  
Or maybe I was Turkish? They both shrugged as Victor continued. My name isn't Victor, either. It's Hank.  
  
Hermione raised an eyebrow. Hank?!?! What the hell kinda name is Hank?!?!?  
  
A loud laugh was heard behind a bookshelf. As Hermione and ...Hank turned around to see the source of it, quick footsteps were heard, signaling its departure.   
  
Anyways, Hermione. I just wanted you to know the truth, finally, and for you to know that I still care about you, and I want to be in a relationship with you again. I miss you.  
  
Hermione began to cry softly. I don't know if I can forgive you. You hurt me so much, and you lied to me this whole time. I don't know who you are anymore!   
  
Hank looked into Hermione's eyes, and held up her head with his hand lightly in her chin. I will make this up to you. I won't let you down.Trust me.  
  
I, I, I just don't know anymore. I don't think I can.   
  
I promise you-I won't fail you. With this, Hank turned and quickly walked out of the library, but not before tripping over his cape and having a bunch of people laughing at him.  
  
Hermione just sat and cried at the unfairness of life, at how she was all alone while Ron and Harry fought crime, and how she didn't get enough schoolwork.  
  
Suddenly, out from the shadows should step no one but-guess who?-DRACO MALFOY!  
  
He looked at the crying form of Hermione, he kneeled in front of her and took her hand. What's wrong, Hermione cough-cough*mudblood*cough-cough?  
  
She answered, vainly trying to stop her tears.  
  
Bullshit. Is there a problem with Draco paused, and took a breath. At this name he broke out in laughter. Hermione looked at him crossly. The laughter stopped, however, as Draco looked deeper into Hermione's eyes.   
  
He leaned into her closer, and closer, and closer still. She sighed, I can't do this...it, it isn't right, I mean, what about Ha-  
  
She was cut off by Draco's lips covering hers in a , yet kiss. And there they stayed, in the back of the library, having a special session, with Draco kneeling on the floor as tall as he could, and Hermione sitting in a chair, leaning over slightly, until...  
  
HERMIONE! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?  
  
At this, Hermione fell out of her chair, which would have been okay except there was a certain Malfoy who was already on the floor...  
  
******  
Sorry for the super-delay. Had a bit (*lot*) of writer's block (sure...)  
  
Love to you all. MUAH! ***Fashiondiva*** P.S.-Reviews are golden (covered chocolate)...


	8. Character Tradeoffs And Smirking Galore

Disclaimer-I own none of these characters. They belong to JK Rowling and the WB, respectively.  
  
Beware: Major HP COS Spoilers! Beware!   
  
***Last Time we were with the Merry Men in Sherwood Forest-oops I meant Harry Potter and co...-***  
  
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HERMIONE! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?  
  
At this, Hermione fell out of her chair, which would have been okay except there was a certain Malfoy who was already on the floor...  
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The Scar  
Chapter 8: Character Tradeoffs (And Smirking Galore)  


  
  
Hermione quickly picked herself up, off of Draco. She breathed.  
  
WHAT THE HELL HERMIONE!! Ron's face was livid. Raising a finger to Malfoy, he hissed, That is Malfoy! What are you, what were you doing?  
  
Hermione looked around, frightenedly, at the few people in the library who were snacking on popcorn and watching them with animated interest. Uh, Ron. It wasn't what you think, it wasn't what it looked like. Maybe we should talk about this somewhere more private.  
  
Draco picked himself up off the ground. So, Ronaldstilkstin, He said, smirking evilly, you've discovered my evil plan.  
  
Ron looked at him blankly.   
  
Draco smirked triumphantly. My evil plot that you have discovered. You know now that I was merely using Hermography-  
  
Hermione quipped.  
  
Malfoy continued as if nothing had happened, smirking darkly. -to get to Harry.  
  
Wait, what? Ron asked, a shocked expression on his face.  
  
I will defeat you Ron, and Harry and I will be together. Malfoy smirked in delight.  
  
Ron's face paled. Hermione looked confused. Malfoy, Ron and Harry aren't gay!  
  
Malfoy's face uh, stayed the same pale color it was, a surprised smirk present on his face. Sick! I don't want to be his lover, I want to be his sidekick!  
  
Hermione's mouth formed a silent as slight color returned to Ron. Thank God. He said without thinking.  
  
Hermione's eyes widen at the exact moment Draco's did at the exact moment Ron covered his mouth. Oh God... Draco gasped.  
  
Oh...my...oh my... Hermione took deep breaths, looking at Ron who became slightly more feminine than he had been before.  
  
Ok, this isn't about me! Said Ron in a high squeaky voice. Come on, we're going to see Dumbledore!  
  
Hermione asked as Ron grabbed her wrist and dragged her out of the library, Malfoy following with a sneaky smirk on his face.  
  
Because you were kissing MALFOY! Ron exclaimed as Draco snickered through his smirk in the shadows. And I know you're following us, Malfoy.  
  
Malfoy's pompous smirk wavered momentarily as he stepped uncertainly into the light. It is I!  
  
Ron raised an eyebrow. Uh, duh! Who do you think I was talking to, the Tooth Fairy?  
  
Suddenly a new voice emerged. Where's the Tooth Fairy? It asked in wonderment.  
  
Ron exclaimed. Harry! You're back! Where were you?  
  
Harry threw his hands up in the air. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYS! YOU NEVER ANSWER ANY OF MY QUESTIONS! YOU'RE ALWAYS TRYING TO HID THINGS FROM ME! I'VE SAVED YOUR LIVES Draco raised his eyebrows with a questioning mock of his face. SO MANY TIMES-OK, EXCEPT FOR YOU, MALFOY! BUT ONLY CAUSE YOUR DAD'S A DEATH EATER!  
  
Draco shrugged with a disinterested smirk. It's true.  
  
Hermione cried out. No, Draco, no! It can't be! Say it ain't so! Tell me he's wrong!   
  
Draco shrugged again, with the same disinterested smirk. Uh, it's true.  
  
Hermione shrugged too. Oh, ok then.  
  
This time it was Draco who called out to Hermione with a solemn smirk, though she was standing beside Ron not 10 feet away. No, Hermione! My Father, Luscious-  
  
Hermione stared blankly. You mean Lucius?  
  
Draco smirked with confusion. That's what I said: Luscious.  
  
Hermione looked very puzzled. No, Lucius.  
  
Where's Luscious?  
  
Hermione threw her arms up in the air.   
  
I don't see Luscious anywhere!  
  
Luscious Lucius (A/N- HAHAHAHAHA!) stepped out of the shadows. I am here, Draco, play nicely. He looked as if he had not seen a mirror in weeks. His usually lustrous blonde hair was dark colored and mangled.   
  
Draco smirked happily. Father, what are you doing here?  
  
Luscious Lucius smirked back at his son. Draco, play nicely. Son, I've brought you a surprise... He pulled inside his robes and extracted a plastic bottle with very strange honey-colored contents.   
  
Ron raised an eyebrow. What in the bloody hell is that? An evil potion to drug Harry?  
  
Draco smirked, terrified, at Luscious Lucius. Father, not here!  
  
Nonsense, Draco, play nicely. We all know that you need it. Lucius said.  
  
Hermione smirked. Now, Draco. That looks to me to be a whole lot like-  
  
Draco interrupted her, with a horrified smirk on his face. -No! No, it isn't what you think it is! You don't know what it is, because you are a filthy mu- a filthy mud- a filthy m- Draco stuttered, his words not coming.   
  
Lucius looked at Draco, an old, senile expression on his face. Now now Draco, play nicely.  
  
Draco smirked in surprise. Hermione! I can't say mudblood! Hermione made to interrupt and point out that he just did say it, but closed her mouth when he continued. Hermione, do you understand why I can't say mudblood?   
  
Hermione shrugged, again choosing not to mention his obvious fault in the thinking process. 'Cause you're a pathetic loser?  
  
Draco smirked in disbelief. No! Well, yes, but-it's also because I am in love with you!  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. Stop lying, you pathetic creep. You're only saying that because you don't want me to tell everyone what Lucius is holding for you. She smirked hugely.  
  
Draco smirked in anxiety. Luscious isn't holding anything for me...  
  
Luscious Lucius cut in. Why yes, I am Draco, play nicely. It's time, you know. We don't want to have it looking like it did before second year started in Flourish and Blotts that day when you checked out Hermione.  
  
Draco smirked in shock, and Hermione's eyes widened. Luscious-Father, I did not ever check out Hermione in Flourish and Blotts before second year started when she was saying Fear of the name only increases fear itself.'!  
  
Hermione's mouth was frozen open in horror. Ron spoke suddenly, though. I remember that day. It was right before Luscious-   
  
Hermione interrupted.  
  
Ron continued. Right, it was right before Luscious said to Hermione, Ahh, you must be-' and then paused and then said Ms. Granger? Yes, Draco's told me all about you. Parents are muggles, aren't they?'And then Hermione looked over at her parents who were talking to Dad.  
  
Draco smirked with a sigh. Yes, Ron. We've all seen the second movie-I-I-uh-I mean, we all REMEMBER that from second year...yeah, uh huh...  
  
Luscious Lucius spoke. Yes, that's nice that you are in love with a mudblood, ickle Drakie, but we really must get to what I came here for. He pointed at his special magical watch, which was just like a Rolex, but instead of saying it said and had part of the scratched off.  
  
Hermione screamed. Malfoy is NOT in love with me!  
  
Suddenly, out of the shadows came a very angry voice. I'm going to kill you!!!!  
  
Who are you? What are you talking about? Who are you going to kill? Asked Ickle Drakie with a fearful smirk.  
  
Ron curled up into a small ball and asked quietly in a high-pitched squeak, Can we panic now?  
  
Luscious Lucius grabbed Draco's hand and ran towards the bathroom, with Draco skipping lazily behind, with a content smirk on his face, throwing petals off flowers and saying, She loves me...she loves me not...she loves me...she loves me not...she loves...  
  
And in burst Harry Potter, still in his Thunder-bolt-boy-who-lived-whose-parents-were-murdered-and-is-seeking-vegeance-for-their-deaths Man getup, from the Entrance hall.  
  
Ron uncurled, and Hermione greeted Harry warmly, and Harry asked. Where were Luscious-  
  
Hermione shrieked   
  
Came Luscious Lucius muffled reply.  
  
Harry spoke again. -Luscious and Draco Malfoy going?  
  
Hermione smirked happily. They are going to re-dye his hair.  
  
They exclaimed in unison.  
  
What, you didn't think his hair was naturally that color, did you? You didn't think ANYONE'S hair is naturally that color, did you? They nodded yes'. Oy! I'm surrounded by idiots... She muttered.   
  
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¡!¡Draco really does check Hermione out at that part in the COS movie...watch the scene in Flourish and Blotts, it's actually really funny!¡!  
  
Hope you enjoyed! Much more to come. *evil grin* Oh yes, much more...  
  
  
***Fashiondiva***


	9. Love and Revelation

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THE SCAR  
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CHAPTER 9: LOVE AND REVELATION  
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Hermione skipped down the corridor of Hogwarts. She sang to herself in a sing-song tone, I wonder what evil can be averted today? She stopped skipping and looked down at her ghetto-fabulous clothes. She added.  
  
Not even ghetto slang will save you now, my little P.I.M.P. Princess...   
  
Hermione gasped.   
  
Draco turned around.   
  
Hermione gave him a look that told him just how stupid she thought he was. You are so stupid. Ok, so maybe that helped him figure it out.  
  
But Hermione, I love you! Draco's face turned serious.  
  
What did you say? Hermione asked in a quiet whisper that wasn't very loud.  
  
I said that I love you.  
  
No, not that, you stupid oaf. Hermione looked at him strangely. You...you called me by my first name.  
  
Yeah, and...? Draco examined his fingernails for potential particles of stuff to find their way under his perfectly manicured....uh...cleaned....nails.  
  
You've never called me by my first name before.  
  
So? You meet new people every day, and do you always get this excited about them being able to pronounce your name?  
  
Hermione looked deep in thought. Oh Draco! She threw herself into Draco's arms. I love you!  
  
Draco's eyes teared up. What...what did you say?  
  
Hermione looked into his eyes wistfully, noticing that his eyes were the same color they'd always been and there was nothing at all different about his appearance. I said that I love you.  
  
No, I mean...you said my first name. You called me Draco.  
  
Hermione looked thoughtful for a moment. Yes...yes I suppose I did.  
  
You've never called me that before. A faint smile made its way to his lips. Hermione...I love-  
  
A ferocious war-cry cut through the air. Hermione looked, frightened, at Draco. He was shaking in fear. Hold me. He whispered. Hold me.  
  
Hermione looked at him with a disconcerted expression.  
  
Suddenly a man clad only in war paint over his entire body burst out of the shadows. The, apparent, man cried roughly. How can you love this Slytherin ferret! I love you!  
  
Hermione look horrified. Hank? Oh God, Hank, is that you?  
  
He answered, snarling, and I've come to finish off this sorry excuse for a ferret!  
  
Hermione cried. And you don't have clothes on! That's more than I ever wanted to see! She shook her head, Gross! Ugh, yuck!  
  
But Hank came steadily closer, a huge spear in hand.  
  
Hermione shouted in slow motion.  
  
Suddenly a caped figure jumped into the scene. Did someone call for a Ferret Slayer? Because I am Ronny, the Ferret Slayer! He was wearing a pair of tight pants and a shirt that showed entirely too much cleavage. Oh wait...  
  
Hermione asked, aghast. What in Merlin's name are you wearing?  
  
He glanced at her. Fighting for ratings. What I need now is a catchy line to say before I start fighting. Hmmm...  
  
Hermione fell to her knees. What next? Hairless monkeys?  
  
Suddenly Crabbe and Goyle walked past them, hunched over and kinda dragging their feet from trying to carry far too much food at one time.  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. Then Harry magically appeared. Ron! Ron, there's something I need to tell you!  
  
Ron stopped trying to think and turned to Harry.  
  
Ron, I... Harry started.  
  
Yes, Harry?  
  
I...I want you to know that...  
  
What is it?  
  
Ron, I'm a ferret too! Harry blurted out.  
  
You're a what?! Ron shouted.  
  
A ferret. You know, small little skinny rodent-things. Malfoy was one in fourth year...  
  
Not for very long! Draco cried out and broke into tears.  
  
How, Harry? Ron asked.   
  
That's not all, Ron. There's something else I've got to tell you. You see, I'm not just a normal ferret. Ron looked at him intensely. Harry continued. Ron, I'm not just a ferret. I'm a ferret with a soul.  
  
What the he- Hermione started, but then realized that Hank was about to pounce on Draco. Hank, no! Stop!   
  
Harry, what are you talking about? There aren't any ferrets with souls.  
  
Ron, I'm the only one. I was cursed by a tribe of Gangsta pimps when I gave one of their women rabies. I've been spending every day since trying to make up for my evil days.  
  
Harry, I don't believe this. I can't believe this...what are you saying?  
  
Ron, wait. There's more. Harry took a deep breath. You see, this curse stops me from being my evil ferret self, Harryus. And I just think you ought to know that you and I can never truly be together.  
  
Ron asked, shocked. Harry, please don't say this.   
  
Ron, I've got to go now. I've got to talk to Dumbledore. Harry turned around, then paused. I'm sorry, Ron. I'm so sorry. He began to walk away.  
  
Ron shook his head furiously, trying to get rid of his tears. Don't walk away from me! Don't you walk away from me, bitch! Ron pulled out a pistol, and, hand shaking, held it out at Harry.  
  
Harry turned around, looking severely worn. What Ron? Do you need to hear that I don't love you? Fine! I don't!  
  
No, no, no, NO! Ron shouted, not believing it. You don't just wake up one day and not love someone anymor-  
  
A horrified scream filled the air. Ron dropped the gun. All eyes turned to Hermione.  
  
She was breathing heavily, staring at Hank, who stood over Draco's limp form with a huge sinister smile and a knife, dripping with blood.  
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**Thanks for reading. Sorry for the major-o time delay in updating. I'm going to try to update a lot more often, I was having definite issues with a little disease called Writersous Blockous. Quite common, but also very deadly. Lucky I survived. A review might help me live through this hard time, though. *Wink* You know what THAT means...  
  
*muah* Fashiondiva


	10. Ferret Slaying

**The Scar**

Chapter 10: Ferret Slaying

Disclaimer: In case you didn't read the summary, I own nothing. Not Harry Potter or anything affiliated with that, nor do I own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or anything affiliated with that, in case you were wondering. I merely poke fun at them.__

            Hermione wept. 'He's gone.' Hermione wept. More.

            Madame Pomfrey poked her head into the waiting room of the Hospital Wing, which was more just a bench more than an actual waiting room. Also, there was no waiting, as Hermione wept over the death of one Draco Malfoy.

            "Ms. Granger?" Madame Pomfrey called to her. Hermione still wept. "Ms. Granger, we've got some good news. It seems Mr. Malfoy will be alright. The stab wasn't actually that deep, there was only minor bleeding."

            Hermione wept louder. "He's dead! He's Dead!!!" She cried.

            Madame Pomfrey looked confused. "Didn't you hear me, dear? Draco will be all right. It was only a stab in the arm, after all. Nothing to be concerned about."

            Hermione fell onto her knees weeping. "Oh gods!" She cried to the heavens…or the ceiling. "Why did he have to die? Why did you take him from me!"

            Madame Pomfrey looked confused.

 **Cue lilting music**.      

            Hermione and Draco were running through a field, bright wildflowers nicking their ankles. Opening their arms to each other as they ran, they ran with the speed of a person on a motorized scooter. With a failing engine.

            A/N-What can I say?  There's a reason Quidditch is flying on broomsticks and not running on the ground.

            Their eyes met, although from a distance. Not looking where she was going, Hermione tripped. "I'm alright! I'm good!" She stood back up and ran to him, a bit of dirt smudged across her face.

            Draco suddenly stopped and crouched down. "Need…. breather…can't…run any…more…" He panted, short of breath, his face flushed.

            Hermione called to Draco. "Come on, my love, we're almost there!"

            He pulled himself back up and ran a couple steps. Then he fainted.

            Hermione ran to his side. "Draco, oh my love, whom I love, oh I love you. Are you alright, lover?" She knelt at his side, and moved closer to him, as to kiss him.

            Draco came to. He looked into Hermione's eyes.

            And then he screamed.

            Hermione fell back onto her bottom in the dirt. "Draco, my love. What's wrong?" She asked, moving closer to him again.

            Draco looked at Hermione. "What the hell do you think you are doing? Look at you; you're covered in dirt and sweat! You'll get me dirty! And I just got a facial! Don't get any closer!" Draco scooted away.

            **End Lilting Music**

            Hermione sighed, although she was still weeping. "Those were good times!" She laughed crazily through her tears. "Why did you take those times from me?!" She screamed.

            Madame Pomfrey yelled to Hermione. "Ms. Granger! Draco will be released in a few hours! He's fine! He's just resting, would you like to see him?"

            Hermione collapsed into a sobbing heap on the ground and wept. She wept for the days that she would never have with Draco, the smirks they would never share, the condescension from him that she would never receive. Hermione was heartbroken.

            Madame Pomfrey sighed, and walked right up to Hermione, who looked straight through her, weeping. Madame turned around, then pivoted back around and struck Hermione with a punch to the face. Hermione wept; then she conked out. Madame Pomfrey smoothed out her dress. "That should shut her up." She walked calmly back into her office. "Stupid students. One of these days…"

            Ron-the-Ferret-Slayer walked into the Hospital Wing. "Hermione?" He looked around. "Hermione, where are you?" He looked around, she was nowhere to be found. "Hmm…let's see. If I were a heartbroken star of a popular series, where would I be?"

He looked pensive for a moment, and then shrugged. "Who knows? I'll just wait in here, I'm sure it'll come to me." With that he walked into the waiting room.

            "Hermione!" He shouted and ran to her side, tears forming at his eyes. "What's wrong?"

            Hermione weakly opened an eye. "-Dead." She wept, and then fell unconscious.

            Ron stood up, a decisive expression across his face. "This can only be the doing of one Evil Ferret. Harryus, wherever you are, I will find you. And I will slay you." He smoothed out his miniskirt and strutted out of the Hospital Wing.

            Ginny Weasley was leaning up against a wall, a thin cigarette poised on her lips. She took a long drag and let it out slowly, that is, until she started coughing forcefully. Almost like her lungs didn't want to be poisoned with every breath she takes with the cigarette. She shrugged it off and pushed off the wall, putting the butt out with her toe as a familiar face came into sight. She smiled, showing off nasty yellow teeth. But as the other person came closer, her expression changed drastically.

            "Ron Weasley! What the hell do you think you're doing?" Ginny demanded angrily, motioning to the shoulder length blonde wig adorning Ron's head.

            Ron rolled his eyes. "Ginny, everyone knows that Slayers are blonde chicks!" He posed. "How do I look?"

            Ginny looked, horrified, at her older brother. "Ron! Look at your legs!"

            Ron looked down quickly, noticing the multicolored adhesive bandages all across his legs. "Shaving." He looked mildly annoyed. "I'll learn."

            Ginny shook her head. "Ron! You are a boy, not a girl! You need to stop this cross-dressing thing! It got old years ago!"

            Ron pursed his lips. "I don't need this from you. I save the world from creatures you can't imagine every day. I would love to be in my room, watching Wizard vision, or talking about boys, or god! Even doing homework! But I can't! I have to save the world!" He walked past Ginny and then turned around to face her. "I have to kill Harryus." Ginny froze in shock.

            Quickly she regained her voice to call to Ron. "You leave now, Ron Weasley, don't you ever come back. Don't you ever. You'll be dead to me."

            Ron kept walking.

            Ginny ran as fast as her legs would carry her, well no, actually she walked. But she didn't have much endurance; her lungs weren't very strong anymore, with the smoking and all. "I have to find Harry!" She said anxiously to herself. "Where is he?"

            Draco opened his eyes and looked around. 'Where am I?' He wondered to himself.

            "I'm sure you are wondering where you are and what you are doing here, Mr. Malfoy." Entered a cheerfully old voice.

            "Yes Headmaster." Draco noticed the sterile look of his surroundings. 'Must be the hospital wing.' He reasoned.

            "In fact, you are probably thinking that you are in the Hospital Wing. You would be correct, Mr. Malfoy." Dumbledore's eyes gleamed brightly.

            'How does he know all of this?' Draco wondered.

            Dumbledore smiled. "I have my ways, Mr. Malfoy." He began to leave, but turned to face Draco. "Oh and Mr. Malfoy, if you happen to see Mr. Potter, could you please direct him to see me. I must speak to him about the scar on his forehead."

            Without waiting for a response, the Headmaster disappeared.

            Draco looked confused. "Potter's scar? What's wrong with Potter's scar?"

            The doors of the Hospital Wing were thrown open. A wild looking Harry Potter burst into the room. He ran around the room crazily.

            "Potter?" Draco looked extremely confused.

            Harry rushed into the waiting room. "Hermione!" He screeched.

            Hermione opened her eyes. "Draco?"

            "No, It's Harry."

            Hermione wept. "Draco…he's…dead!" She held herself as she wept.

            Harry patted her on the back. "Oh 'Mione. At least you have parents. My parents…" Harry's voice broke, and a few tears fell from his face.

            Hermione looked up through her tears. "Oh Harry, I'm so sorry. I forgot."

            Harry's face turned grave. "You could, couldn't you?" He spat. "You never knew them at all. Not like I did!"

            Hermione looked at him strangely. "Harry, you were a baby when they died."

            Harry glared at her. "Oh, so you want to rub in it, now? Fine! You have parents and I don't! You're parents weren't murdered! Oh, MUM!" Harry broke into tears.

            Hermione moved closer to Harry. "I'm so sorry Harry. I was so involved with myself-"

            "You're sorry?" Asked Harry angrily. "You're sorry, Hermione?! How can you ever talk to me about loss? My parents are dead! You don't know what that's like, you have parents, even if they aren't wizards, you Mudblood!"

            Hermione flinched and pulled far away from Harry. Pressed against a wall, she whispered. "You really are evil, aren't you?"

            Harry looked up at her. "No Hermione. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like-"

            Draco walked into the room. "Hey guys. What's going on? Oof!" He fell to the ground as a thin pale girl in a tight miniskirt with long blonde hair ran into the waiting room, accidentally pushing him on her way. Oh no, that's just Ron.

            Ron smirked triumphantly. "I thought I'd find you here, Ferret."

            Draco shook his head, upset. "I was only a Ferret for a little while! I'm better now!"

            Ron didn't seem to notice Draco at all. He was looking intently at Harry. "I'm going to slay you, demon."

            "That's not very nice! I never did anything to you!" Shouted Draco, although no one even seemed to hear him.

            Harry stood up and faced Ron. "You couldn't do it last time. You still can't do it."

            Ron looked cheated. "Draco was stabbed! I was a little distracted!"

            Hermione fell to a heap on the floor. "Draco! Oh Draco!" She wept.

            "Yeah Hermione, I'm right here." Draco moved nearer to Hermione. Although not too close, she had a little dried blood on her hands and face.

            Hermione didn't seem to notice him.

            Ginny Weasley walked into the waiting room. "Harry, Nooooooo-" She started coughing awfully. "Hold on a second" She croaked. "Okay. -Ooooooooo!!!"

            Ron glanced back at her. "Ginny, don't get in the middle of this. Just get out. This is between me," he pointed to himself, and then to Harry, "and my prey."

            Ginny screamed. Or she would have if she hadn't started coughing again. She moved slowly until she stood in front of Harry. "I won't let-" she coughed, "you!"

            Ron pulled out a dagger from a thigh holster. "Sorry Ginny, but this is business." He moved closer until he was only a foot from Ginny. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and tossed them across the room. Ginny squealed and chased them.

            Ron looked hard at Harry. "So this is how it ends."

            Hermione rushed up and stood in front of Harry. "I'm sorry Ron, but I can't let you do this, even if Harry is evil."

            Draco stood up. "Oh, Potter. That reminds me, Dumbledore wants you to go see him. Something about your bleedin' scar."

            Ron glared at Hermione. "You can't stand in my way, Hermione. None of you can." He took a deep breath and looked at them both. "I'm Ron, the Ferret Slayer!"

            Hermione looked at Ron. "You obviously forget that you aren't the only superhero here!" Clothes were ripped off and suddenly there was much spandex and little else.

            Ron shuddered. Not only because the wrath of the Gangsta Princess was upon him, but Harry's costume had somehow been shrunk and was FAR too small for him.

            Harry squirmed. "Something's wrong here…" He tried to pull his spandex shorts down, but to no avail, they snapped right back up. Too far up.

            Suddenly Ron lunged forward, and the battle of the Superheroes was begun. In a clash of fists of fury, screaming and hair pulling, and those little pop up signs of "KaPOW!" "Thunk!" "Ouch!" and multitudes of other things, the fight was violent and terrible. Actually terrible, as in terrible pathetic.

            Draco stood on the edge of the room, waiting for it to end, though not wanting to get involved, for fear of blemishing his perfect face, not to mention the rest of his perfect self. Soon he got bored. Watching Harry Potter fight in something so tight it should never be worn by any creature, living or otherwise, was not Draco Malfoy's ideal way to spend the evening. "Could you all just STOP!" Draco shouted.

            He was ignored. Draco tried again and again, but to no avail. "What in blazes is going on here? Is everyone bloody crazy! Hello?! I'm here! STOP FIGHTING!!!"

            And still, no response. Draco sighed and walked out of the Hospital Wing, desperate to find someone who would acknowledge him.

Sorry it took so long to update this chapter. I hope to hear from you in the form of a review! Thanks!

 **Fashiondiva**


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